I started The Watered Sprout blog as a result of many hours of research trying to learn how to deal with panic attacks and being diagnosed with chronic anxiety. On September 10th 2009 I received a phone call informing me that my soon to be fiancé had been killed in action while serving his first tour in Afghanistan. The rollercoaster of pain and emotions since that moment have been more difficult than I could possibly begin to express into words; though I will try my best to share my heart through this blog. In the following months, after losing Tyler, I also had to learn to deal with hurtful relationships/friendships and various trials that came my way. Little did I know that during all this emotional pain, my body had begun a treacherous journey headed straight toward a pit of anxiety and mild depression.
I have always preferred taking a organic and homeopathic approach to healing my body, so it was naturally my first line of defense as my body became run down and weary, as a result of the anxiety and going through grieving. I was unaware of any issues until I was taken completely by surprise one day when I suddenly became short of breath, with shaky hands, and felt as though I was going to faint while I was running an errand. I remember the wave of panic as I quickly left everything in the store and hurried out to my car. I had no idea what was happening, or why it had come on so sudden. After a few more “episodes”, and trying to figure things out on my own, I was desperate for answers and made an appointment with a doctor. They ran every test under the sun for the symptoms I was experiencing, and then promptly told me that I had anxiety and most definitely post traumatic stress; as a result of the loss I had gone through almost a year earlier. After I was adamant that I didn’t want any addictive or strong drugs, I was given two prescriptions to help me sleep and slightly knock the edge off that panic attacks for a short time. I walked away from the doctor office that day completely discouraged and overwhelmed that I had just gone through the time and money (without having insurance), just to find out that ugly culprit of my "normal" days was anxiety and PTSD. I was of course happy to hear it wasn’t something more serious that was wrong, but I was overwhelmed just the same.
Since that appointment, in September 2010, I have continued to battle the ugly dragon of anxiety. After taking the prescriptions for 6 months, and not feeling much of result, I decided to wean myself off of them and rely on natural remedies. The Watered Sprout is all about my journey to restore my body, as well as my heart and soul, through eating raw/whole foods, juicing, using homeopathic remedies, pouring encouragement into my thoughts, and clinging to my faith.
Through the past year I have spent many more hours on-line searching for any advice I could get on dealing with loss and anxiety. I have searched for the perfect relaxing yoga workout, or music, to help me breath; as well as quotes and scripture that would encourage my broken heart. I have also hidden my nose in countless 'uncookbooks' looking for organic and raw recipes that could help restore balance and health to my body. As I have invested all this time I have so wished that there could be one place where I could find all the information I have been desperate to find. The Watered Sprout Blog is my attempt to put all of my gathered information together as a gift for you :o). If you are desperate to tend to that little sprout of hope in your heart that is aching to be watered with encouragement, and take care of your body by eating yummy organic foods, and then this is the place for you!
Since starting my blog in 2010 there have been many changes in my life. I have been blessed to marry the man that has been one of my closest friends that past 3 years. We got engaged in December 2011 and had a lovely wedding 6 weeks later so that I could move with him to his next duty station...in Germany! I definitely wrestled with the idea of becoming a military wife all through our dating, but after a few break ups and many discussions with friends and family I decided that there was no hiding, or running away, from true love and that I was willing to take all the risks and challenges that ahead of me if it meant that I get to have the blessing of having unconditional and abundant love in my life once more.
A week after our wedding in January we were on our way to Germany and all that married life holds for us. At the time when I am writing this we have been in a military hotel on post for 2 months and we are currently waiting to move into our adorable apartment in a quaint little town. There have definitely been some big challenges already, but we are determined to keep pressing ahead and counting our blessings.
My desire is that this blog will be a little spot in the garden of blogs where you will find a friend, as well as all the 'sunshine' and 'water' that your heart's little sprout of hope needs. Join me on my journey!